So, I have been blogging for awhile now and I haven’t really told you guys ‘my story’. People ask me all the time why I am such a fitness nut, or why I am motivated to workout as much as I do, and why I actually, dare I say, like it..
See, food and I have a history. I went through a very rough time at one point in my life and as a result I developed some extremely unhealthy, and dangerous habits. Long story short, I deprived myself for as long as I could, then I would make up for what I didn’t eat times ten.
The most screwed up part about the whole thing is I seriously thought food was the root of my unhappiness, not the fact that my dad was (is) an alcoholic, my parents were going through a nasty divorce, and I just broke up with my first love, someone I had unknowingly relied on as my source of stability and normalcy for the last 4 1/2 years.
It took about 3 1/2 years to realize how everything was connected, and I slowly started healing. My life was an emotional shit- show, in which most of it I had no control over, thus the feeling to control my food.. aha! The more aha! moments I had, the better my relationship with food became.
I know some people will think I am being dramatic when I say this, but I wouldn’t have been able to get through all of this without fitness. It is what I turned to when nothing else could lift me up. I worked through problems while running, all the while endorphin’s were being pumped throughout my body. I could decipher what was truth and what was a lie when working out. It was one of the only times my mind was clear.
It has been about three years since feeling out of control with my eating habits. There are times when life gets crazy and I get the urge to ‘control’ my diet, and sometimes I even catch myself falling into old habits, but I know I will never go back to the place I was before because of what I learned the first go- around.
The reason I am such a fitness nut is because it saved my life.
I have an urgency in my heart to help others who are going through similar situations. I want people to see that fitness is so much more than vanity.
I am not going to lie, this was extremely hard to share, but it has been weighing on my heart for several months now. I knew if I wanted to make a difference in someone’s life I had to tell my story.
Thanks for listening, my beautiful peeps.